The Funniest Thing

The funniest thing happened to me this morning. My hubby and I spent the weekend in Brisbane City, getting away for our anniversary (child free !!!) .

We stayed in a hotel in George Street across from the Treasury and just minutes from Southbank. Anyway..... I got out of bed at the crack of dawn to go for a run. Here I was standing on the corner in my running gear, waiting for the lights to turn green so I could start my jog across the bridge and into the southbank parklands, when I heard a voice right behind me. "What a nice figure you have". I turned, startled to see a reasonably normal looking man smiling at me. He was dressed as though he was just out for a morning walk. *Did he really just say that?* I mumbled a rather shy and pathetic 'thank you' then turned on my heal and ran (literally) in the opposite direction... I was a little freaked out to be honest. And I heard him yell out "seriously, you don't need to run away, I was just telling you that you have a nice figure!"

I didn't know WHAT to make of it. The city at 5am on a Sunday morning is a little bit of an interesting place to be. There was a body lying on the footpath, sleeping off the night before. There were hoarse, still slightly drunk revellers hovering out the front of the Casino trying to keep the mood going, but failing miserably and succumbing to their fatigue as the sun rose. And here I was in my (lorna jane *preen*) running gear about to start my day with an intoxicating run. I'm sure I looked a little out of place.

Anyway, after I got over it, I realised that THAT was my very first compliment from a stranger. And he didn't even KNOW how fat I used to be !!

So I thought to myself - just take the friggin compliment. Don't question it, don't assume that he was a nutter fruitcake who was about to touch me up whilst grinning wildly and smacking his lips together (geez, my imagination). Just think of him as a regular guy who likes to express himself when he sees something pleasing to his eye.

Weird, but kinda nice at the same time.

x

Run-Swim-Run, Kristin, and New Goals

Yep, its over now. The little goal I set at the beginning of the year is over. Not much to tell really. I arrived at the Noosa Surf Club to all the buzz and excitement. I looked out at the buoys out in the ocean and quietly shit my pants. However, after I got over myself and got into it....I loved it. I found the swim a bit of a challenge (as I suspected I would). I was quite surprised at how the fear of the ocean disappeared and wasn't at all an issue. It was the swell and the salt water and the sweeps that drove me nuts. But I still managed to overtake 3 swimmers who had entered the water well ahead of me, so I guess all those laps in the pool paid off.

Last week I was lucky enough to catch up with the beautiful Kristin and her man, Eric at Coolum. I was so glad we caught up. Kristin works for Ideal Bodies Online and she wrote both my 12 week programs. She has also taken the time to follow my journey over the past 10 months and has left some very encouraging and supportive comments on my blog. Kristin's passion for wellbeing, health and fitness is very inspiring and she has an amazing amount of understanding and empathy for someone of her age. I've also enjoyed following her own journey to her first figure comp. Thanks again Kristin. Its so hard to get started on a journey like this, there is so much to be overwhelmed and intimidated by. With so much weight to lose, I was unsure and fearful but the support and encouragement from people like yourself has been monumental in my journey, so a big THANK YOU !!

So, I don't really have much else to tell. Life is ticking along nicely. Looks like I'll be joining a team entry into a triathalon in december. I'm going to do the run leg. Its a nice intro to triathalons. I want to do a couple early next year, so entering in as a team is a good way to start.

I'm giving some thoughts to future goals for next year regarding my health and fitness. At the moment, I've got a couple of short term goals that I'd like to achieve before xmas.... did you realise its only 6 or 7 weeks away ??????

xx

Too tired to speak - but here are some photos

Pre Race Nerves

Entering the water for the dreaded swim leg

My beautiful baby girl

Thank GOD that's over !

You can't see him - but that's my Dad. It was a big deal for him to come up.

My beautiful little man.

My Hubby was at the finish line - this is when I cried. (sook)

I actually don't really have much to say... I just wanted to put up another post, cos the first thing I see when I log on to my blog is the retched before photo of me when I looked like a miserable sap.

Well, actually I do have something to say.....

Tomorrow is the Run Swim Run event. Its the event that started it all for me. In December last year, weighing 90.1 kg's I decided I was going to get fit and change my life. After a friend suggested to pick a fitness goal instead of a weight loss goal, I scoured USM events website to find an event to set as a long term fitness goal.

The Run Swim Run is a 1.5 km run, 750 m swim and another 1.5km run.

Not only am I going to do it 10 months after setting the goal, but I'm going to do it 27kg's lighter than I was when I decided to do it.

And I did it. I followed through on something for the first time in my 36 years. Its not a ground breaking event by any means and after all the training I've done, I don't expect it to kill me. But it will be a monumental moment for many reasons. I'm nervous and emotional because I still have to pinch myself to realise that I've followed through on the most challenging journey (besides motherhood, of course) I've ever undertaken.

xx

Fuck It

FYI - Date of 'before' photos is 12th January 2009. Date of 'after' photos is 25th October 2009.

The photo debate

Today is the end of my 2nd 12 week IBO program. Admittedly, I didn't work as hard or follow my nutrition program as consistently as last time. But I certainly don't have an issue with it, because by committing to another 12 weeks I was able to really cement some good life long habits.

Now, I'm trying to decide whether to post some before and after photos.

I'm not finished with my transformation. I want to lose at least another 10% of body fat (probably more... we'll see) I want to build shit loads more muscle and then after all is as tight as its gonna get, then I want to have surgery to remove what no amount of exercise or diet will remove.

So, I'm pondering. Do I, or don't I..... post the photos. Once they're out there thats it... once they have been seen, there's no turning back. If it was just blogland, maybe I wouldn't mind. But there are a lot of people who read my blog who ACTUALLY know me....

And do I really want the current photos to be seen? I mean, my 'after' photos are the same (if not worse) than other peoples 'before' photos.

I have no illusions about the fact that there is a LONG way to go for me still.

So do I wait? Or do I post?

Fish Out Of Water

Yesterday, I took 'stepping out of my comfort zone' to a whole new level.

I did my first group ride yesterday. Well sort of. We started off on the back of a group and dropped off about 10 km's into the ride. It was OK. I felt very, very intimidated by all the bikes and all the lycra. There was me on my lil Fuji with my asics runners and toe strap pedals (very uncool).

I'm not sure that I was really in the right mood to be doing it yesterday. I had a melt down over the past few days. Long story, not going into it, but I was feeling fragile and teary over life in general.

I didn't really understand what we were doing, I just got told to meet Mick at Mooloolaba at 5.30 in the morning. We got our bikes out, and Mick rolled off, I started to follow him then realised I didn't lock my car, so I rode back to lock it. Then fear gripped me, cos I didn't know where Mick was and there were cyclists everywhere. I felt lost and clumsy (it was only my 3rd time EVER on the bike). So I rode up a small hill towards the esplanade in the direction that I saw Mick ride off to and looking around, with the sun directly in my eyes, I thought I saw him standing at the coffee club. I turned around and because I was rolling gently up hill (not a good thing to do) my wheels came to stand still and before I knew what I was doing, I just fell sideways. I couldn't get my foot out of the straps in time to stop myself falling and I came down on my side.

FUCK.

There I was on the ground. With skin off my knee. I could feel the tears of humiliation welling up. Mick rode over to see if I was OK. I just got up and rolled my bike over the road to the coffee club.... to where 100 cyclists were sitting having there pre-ride coffee's. I just wanted to run and hide.

I made a dash for the toilets where I sat and cried like a baby for a few minutes. I felt that overwhelming feeling of humiliation. I shouldn't be there, I wasn't ready for this. But I was there and I had to just suck it up. So I gave myself an uppercut, dried my tears, held my head up and walked to the table to drink my long black. It was OK, my new sunnies looked hot, and they doubled up as a disguise to hide my swollen, puffy red eyes.

If Mick knew there was something wrong, he didn't say much. And so we made some small talk, at which time he informed me that we were hanging on the back of the group ride from Mooloolaba to Caloundra and back. Oh and by the way, see that chick over there (the one with the Australian Institute of Sport all over her kit)..... yep, her.... well, she's the Australian Champion. And she'll be on the ride.

Great.

He suggested we hang in the middle of the group. I steadfastly refused and said I wanted to be on the back where I could drop off at any time. For god's sake, I've only been on the bike THREE TIMES. I'm not comfortable with wheels whizzing within inches from mine.... no way. I was like a fish out of water and I hated the first 5 km's immensely.

After a while, I became a little more comfortable. I was actually beginning to enjoy it and I hung on along Nicklin Way, all the way to Currimundi where we hit a few hills and I dropped off the back. I asked Mick if he was disappointed that I didn't hang on longer and he said that he fully expected us to drop off about there, so I didn't feel so bad after that. So I followed him along the Caloundra foreshore, its quite hilly and I actually enjoy digging in over hills. We went all the way along to Golden Beach and then back along Nicklin Way where the rest of the group (who actually did an extra 10km's than we did) caught us back up again. As soon as I heard someone shout 'keep left', I immediately felt that fear all over again. Of course, they were telling me to keep left because 100 cyclists were about to come whizzing past me travelling at about 55 km's per hour.

I felt like I didn't belong there and I was angry at Mick for taking me when I wasn't ready. Lucky for me he's not that oversensitive and my hostility and annoyance was like water off a ducks back and of course, he practically told me to just suck it up. And that he wouldn't have taken me if he didn't think I could handle it.

Did I mention that the ride was 40km's in total?

Its lucky actually, that I have people around me who have more confidence in my abilities than I do. As much as I am an advocate for stepping out of ones comfort zone, I too sometimes need someone to actually give me a little shove into the unknown. And lucky for me I have several of those people around me on this journey.

So, that was my first group ride. And I won't be doing that particular one again for a while. I've told Mick that his baby sitting duties are officially over. He can go back to being at the front of the group doing 50-60 km's per hour on 70km rides and I'm going to join the local touring club who do rides for beginners, allowing riders to gain experience at a slower pace.

I appreciate his help, but his experience far exceeds mine and I would prefer to just go off on my own and get comfortable and experienced in my own time. Then I'll come back in 6-12 months time and proudly and confidently sit in the middle of group, and hold on for the entire ride.

Until then..... its baby steps.

xx